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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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IKEA Placing Cardboard Cutouts Of Dogs In Furniture Showrooms To Encourage Adoption

Select IKEA stores are strategically placing life-sized cardboard cutouts of dogs in furniture showrooms to help customers visualize what their homes would look like with a dog, part of a program aimed at encouraging pet adoption. What do you think?

  • “It’s brilliant—ideas like this could really change what couples argue about inside the store.”

    Meryl Kerr Candy Bowl Restocker
  • “Sure, it looks cute in the showroom, but when they deliver the dog it’s in 100 different pieces.”

    Alex Davison Keyboard Cleaner
  • “Can’t I go anywhere anymore without being subtly encouraged to do something altruistic?”

    Brandon Mehling Meeting Scheduler
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