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Man Knows Exactly Which Asshole Got Him Sick

SARATOGA SPRINGS, NY—Immediately realizing the genesis of the fever and sore throat that left him feeling like shit, 30-year-old local man Edward Mosley told reporters Tuesday that he knows exactly which asshole got him sick.

How Gerrymandering Works

The Supreme Court is considering a case regarding the partisan gerrymandering of districts in Wisconsin, which could change the way maps are drawn across the country. Here is a step-by-step guide to how Gerrymandering works.
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Immigration Rallies Smaller

Labor Day immigration rallies drew fewer numbers than the marches held from earlier this year. What do you think?
  • "If it’s true that these illegal immigrants are too lazy to fight for their rights, then that just proves how American they truly are."

    Dave McTeague Laboratory Technician
  • "Just goes to show you, the rights of immigrants will always come in a distant second when going head-to-head with a nice plate of potato salad."

    Warren Haggerty Psychologist
  • "Well, there you have it. Sometimes these issues just find ways of working themselves out."

    Angela Ronis Caregiver

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