Insurance Costs Outstrip Wage Increases

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Goodwill Executives Arrested After Years Of Skimming Donated Goods Off Top

ROCKVILLE, MD—In what authorities are calling one of the most wide-reaching and deplorable cases of embezzlement in recent history, seven executives at Goodwill Industries International were arrested Thursday for allegedly skimming used clothing, old furniture, small appliances, and thousands of other donated items from the charitable group.

Meteorologists Say Upcoming Hurricane Season To Be Permanent

SILVER SPRING, MD—Warning residents to prepare for extreme winds, heavy rainfall, and flooding starting in the near future and continuing indefinitely, meteorologists at the National Weather Service announced Friday that the upcoming hurricane season would be permanent.
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  • Man’s Body Running Out Of Ideas To Convince Him He Full

    BAYTOWN, TX—Having repeatedly ratcheted up the 34-year-old’s level of discomfort with no noticeable effect on his behavior, the body of local man Kent Dugan confirmed Wednesday that it was starting to run out of ideas to convince him that he was full.

Insurance Costs Outstrip Wage Increases

The cost of health insurance premiums in the United States rose 9 percent this year, nearly three times the rate of increase seen in 2010. What do you think?

  • "No thanks. Life's not that cool."

    Rick Dunn
    Planisher
  • "I’m pretty sure the finger can be pointed directly at my neighbor, who gets colonoscopies like they’re going out of style."

    Julian Smith
    Work-Ticket Distributor
  • "Yesterday that would have worried me, but this morning I found a similar lump on the opposite breast, so I'm cool."

    Sarah Harrison
    Guide Winder