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Politics

Robert Mueller Driving SUV 100 MPH Down Runway As Air Force One Narrowly Lifts Off

PRINCE GEORGE’S COUNTY, MD—Sending a pair of guards scrambling for safety as he gunned his black SUV through a chain-link gate and onto the tarmac, Robert Mueller, the former FBI director who was recently tapped to lead the ongoing investigation into the Trump campaign’s ties to Russia, chased Air Force One down the runway at Joint Base Andrews moments before takeoff, sources reported Tuesday.

Trump Asks Entire Senate To Clear Out Of Chamber So He Can Speak To Comey Alone

WASHINGTON—Entering through a side door and bidding the assembled legislators, congressional aides, and members of the media to give him a moment with the former FBI director, President Donald Trump reportedly asked the entire Senate to clear the chamber during James Comey’s testimony Thursday so he could speak to him alone.

A Timeline Of The Watergate Scandal

With the White House mired in controversy, comparisons to Washington’s most famous scandal have been common, if not always accurate. Forty-five years after the events leading to Nixon’s resignation, The Onion presents a detailed timeline of the Watergate scandal.
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Is Europe Al-Qaeda Target?

In a new audiotape, Osama bin Laden blasted Danish newspapers for republishing cartoons featuring images of the Prophet Muhammad, and threatened action against Europeans. What do you think?
  • "When is bin Laden going to start talking about real issues, like global warming?"

    Ben Chalmers Car Stereo Installer
  • "Ah, that bin Laden guy is all talk. Sometimes."

    Amy Myer Systems Analyst
  • "It's a waste of time trying to intimidate Denmark. As long as there is one Danish person alive to put a pen to paper, there will be a poorly-rendered, silly-captioned Muhammad cartoon."

    Ed Patterson Office Supplies Salesman

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