Is Oral Sex Sex?

Top Headlines

Recent News

Siblings Each Hoping Other One Will Take Care Of Aging Parents Someday

CLEVELAND—Explaining that they simply didn’t want to have to deal with the immense time commitment and emotional exhaustion, sisters Katie and Ellen Cattell each privately admitted to reporters this week that they were hoping the other sibling would someday be the one to take care of their aging parents.

Cake Just Sitting There

Take It

CHICAGO—Assuring you that there was nothing to worry about and not a soul around who would see you, sources confirmed Tuesday that a large piece of chocolate cake was just sitting there and that you should go ahead and take it.

Where Your Political Donation Goes

With over $1 billion spent in the 2016 presidential race alone, campaign donations continue to cause much controversy and even confusion for their role in shaping politics. Here is a step-by-step guide to how the average American’s political donation travels through a campaign

Roommate Skulking Around Edge Of Party Like Victorian Ghost Child

SEATTLE—Appearing initially in the far corner of the living room and then several minutes later on the threshold between the kitchen and the hallway, local roommate Kelsey Stahl was, by multiple accounts, seen skulking around the edge of a house party Friday like a Victorian ghost child.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Is Oral Sex Sex?

According to a recent USA Today cover story, oral sex is sharply on the rise among teenagers, many of whom do not consider it a form of sex. What do you think?
  • "That's a relief. Turns out I haven't been sexually abusing my son, after all."

    Bernie Porter Locksmith
  • "I was shocked to find that cunnilingus accounted for a full 1.3 percent of these oral-sex cases."

    Nina Hahn Occupational Therapist
  • "This is just more of the usual conservative-Christian hysteria over teenagers swallowing miles of cock."

    Roger Blauvelt Systems Analyst
  • "So is it wrong when I tell my students, 'Make love to me with your mouth'?"

    Robert Hastings Teacher
  • "These teens will believe anything the president goes on TV and says."

    Bernice Cole Medical Assistant
  • "As a teen math whiz, I can't say I've heard or seen anything about this."

    Leonard Doby Student


Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close