adBlockCheck

Is The President Above The Law?

Top Headlines

Politics

Man Born With Face You Just Want To Punch

In case you missed last night's premiere of the second season of "Onion News Network", watch Jean Anne Whorton's touching portrait of a man who was born with a god-awful, hateful face.

Cannon Overshoots Tim Kaine Across Wells Fargo Center

PHILADELPHIA—Noting that the vice presidential nominee had been launched nearly 100 feet into the air during his entrance into the Democratic National Convention Wednesday night, sources reported that the cannon at the back of the Wells Fargo Center had accidentally overshot Tim Kaine across the arena, sending him crashing to the stage several dozen feet beyond the erected safety net.

Who Is Tim Kaine?

Virginia senator Tim Kaine will be Hillary Clinton’s running mate on the Democratic Party ticket in the 2016 presidential election. Here’s what you need to know about Kaine

Lone Superdelegate Voting For Martin O’Malley Feels Like Total Fucking Idiot

PHILADELPHIA—Sheepishly raising his hand to nominate the man who suspended his presidential campaign back in February, unpledged delegate Bob Shiefke told reporters Tuesday he felt like a “total fucking idiot” for being the only person at the Democratic National Convention voting for former Maryland governor Martin O’Malley.

Michelle Obama: ‘Well, There Are 8 Years Of My Life I’ll Never Get Back’

PHILADELPHIA—Her face fixed in an expression of apathetic detachment as she took the stage Monday night to raucous cheers and applause, First Lady Michelle Obama reportedly began her address to the Democratic National Convention by exhaling audibly and remarking that she would never get the past eight years of her life back.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Is The President Above The Law?

Last week, President Clinton's Whitewater business partner was sentenced to three years in prison, while the president avoided standing trial. Days later, Attorney General Janet Reno announced she would not order an investigation of Clinton's questionable 1996 election fund-raising. Should presidents in some cases be exempt from prosecution?
  • "Presidents should be held accountable for all their actions. Except shoplifting. That's no big deal."

    Felicia Koonce Systems Analyst
  • "I still think they should have made Gerald Ford stand trial for strangling that hooker."

    Tyler Grieg Chiropractor
  • "When I was president of the River Valley Birdwatchers Club, I had free reign. I was fuckin' unstoppable."

    Ryan Sturbridge School Psychologist
  • "Clinton should go to jail for Whitewater 'cause he's a fag-lovin', pot-smokin', womanizing draft dodger. Do you ride this bus often?"

    Nevin Vance Bartender
  • "Bill Clinton is still a young man. If any of these crimes should end up on his permanent record, it may limit his options later in life."

    Donna Moreland Sculptor
  • "In a democratic society like ours, only one man is above the law. I speak, of course, of box-office action champ Steven Seagal."

    Tim Brundage Chemical Engineer

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close