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Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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Italian Troops Out Of Iraq

Newly elected Italian Prime Minister Romano Prodi said that the invasion of Iraq was a "grave error" and will propose withdrawing Italian troops. What do you think?
  • "Fuck! Now I have to throw out my Italian wine, too?"

    Jorge Previn Bouncer
  • "I just hope they don't close that charming Iraqi-Italian place in Fallujah where Mahmoud and I first fell in love."

    Sue Maines Bike Mechanic
  • "But who's gonna get all hot-blooded when the Iraqis insult our troops' honor?"

    Andre Wilson Exterminator

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