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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.
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Jessica Biel Searches Infectious

According to a study by McAfee, 20 percent of all searches for actress Jessica Biel will return results infected with a virus or malware. What do you think?
  • "I choose to focus on the other 80 percent that return photos of a nice-looking woman with a phenomenal publicist and a fairly catchy name."

    Charlie Biggin Meter Reader
  • "What about combing through her garbage for a memento of some kind? That's harmless, right?"

    Kevin Pozner Labor Organizer
  • "Once I did a web search on Stephen Hawking, and my PC instantly gained 850 terabytes of memory and a 3-D holographic touch-screen interface."

    Charlotte Haber UPS Driver

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