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Man Knows Exactly Which Asshole Got Him Sick

SARATOGA SPRINGS, NY—Immediately realizing the genesis of the fever and sore throat that left him feeling like shit, 30-year-old local man Edward Mosley told reporters Tuesday that he knows exactly which asshole got him sick.

How Gerrymandering Works

The Supreme Court is considering a case regarding the partisan gerrymandering of districts in Wisconsin, which could change the way maps are drawn across the country. Here is a step-by-step guide to how Gerrymandering works.
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JonBenet Suspect Confesses

A former teacher has been arrested in Thailand for the murder of JonBenet Ramsey. What do you think?
  • "And just in the nick of time. The public was almost ready to move on to another tragedy."

    Jake Banker Stock Clerk
  • "Was JonBenet the one who shot Joey Buttafucco because he cut off the penis of Tonya Harding's husband, OJ Simpson?"

    Troy Canzona Caterer
  • "An accused murdering sex-offender goes into hiding, and no one thinks to check out Thailand?"

    Jessica Kinzler Donut Maker

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