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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

What You Need To Know About The Trump Administration’s Ties To Russia

New revelations from the U.S. intelligence community about potentially illegal communications between members of the Trump administration and Russian officials, which led to Michael Flynn resigning as national security advisor Monday, have increased calls for a wider investigation of Trump’s murky ties to Russia. Here’s what you need to know.

A Timeline Of Valentine’s Day History

Every February, people across the world engage in romantic traditions with their loved ones in celebration of Valentine’s Day. The Onion provides a timeline of the holiday’s inception and evolution:
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Jury: Peterson Deserves Death

Last week, jurors recommended that Scott Peterson be sentenced to death for murdering his pregnant wife, Laci. What do you think?
  • "Let this be a warning to psychopaths with photogenic wives everywhere."

    Pedro Fernandez Baggage Porter
  • "What about Laci's fetus' potential children, and those childrens' children? Folks, this was way more than a double-homicide."

    Derrick Watts Systems Analyst
  • "What's going on? I've been busy trying to keep up with the thousands of other murders that took place this year. I'm a bit out of the loop on the Peterson case."

    Sherry Morrison Cashier
  • "This story had everything—sex, death, and now death once again. I would've appreciated some more sex, also."

    Rich Hale Bartender
  • "What am I supposed to tell my daughter when she asks, 'Why do exhaustively drawn-out things happen to bad people?'"

    Warren Jacobs Ship Captain
  • "Finally, the death of little Connor, the fetus with no personality, will be avenged."

    Florence Norris Cardiologist
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Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

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