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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Justin Bieber Arrested For DUI, Drag Racing

Nineteen-year-old pop icon Justin Bieber was arrested in Miami Beach, FL this morning on charges that he drag raced a Lamborghini down a residential street and then failed a field sobriety test, with each offense potentially netting Bieber up to six months of jail time. What do you think?

  • “See, this is what happens when the public doesn’t pay attention to Justin Bieber enough.”

    Nadia Giardino Off-Campus Housing Director
  • “He strikes me as someone who would do well in jail.”

    James Hooper Unemployed
  • “But what about all those adorable songs he wrote about being in perfect mental health?”

    Terry Shaffer Leather Finisher
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