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Tips For Back-To-School Shopping

As kids prepare to go back to school, parents are tasked with providing all the supplies and clothes they’ll need for the year. Here are The Onion’s tips for tackling back-to-school shopping.

Report: Sky Normal Today

WASHINGTON—Informing citizens there really wasn’t anything special going on up there, the nation’s scientists confirmed the sky is normal today.
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Katy Perry To Be ‘American Idol’ Judge

Pop singer Katy Perry will take over as a judge on American Idol when ABC brings back the popular musical competition series later this year. What do you think?

  • “I’ve always said she was this generation’s Randy Jackson.”

    Patrick Rice Bolt Stripper
  • “I hope her originalist interpretation of the Idol charter will reverse the previous judges’ overreach.”

    Kate Sartori Match Fixer
  • “She has no right to judge anyone after that lackluster performance at the Kansas City Sprint Center.”

    Wade Fenton Chain Gang Foreman

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