Killings Of Environmentalists On The Rise

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Vol 48 Issue 26

Whatevs House

This house is pretty cool. It can get a little hot in the summertime, but no big deal. It's pretty roomy.

Your Dream Home!

Sometimes, dreams do come true. Not this time, though. Buy this mediocre home and then imagine you live somewhere much, much better.
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Killings Of Environmentalists On The Rise

According to a report from the group Global Witness, murders of environmental activists have risen dramatically over the past three years. What do you think?

  • “Yeah, well, natural disasters killed 27,000 people last year compared with 106 environmentalist murders, so maybe these people should reconsider their loyalties.”

    Michele DoQui
    Weft Straightener
  • “Oh, I know. Just last week my brother-in-law wouldn't stop talking about how I absolutely had to start using a composting toilet, and I could've just—argh! You understand, right?”

    Michael Wise
    Grip Wrapper
  • “Has anyone investigated Joni Mitchell? She’s probably raking in some serious scratch from performances of ‘Big Yellow Taxi’ at all the funerals.”

    Duke Perry
    Unemployed
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