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New EPA Chief Proposes 30% Cut In All Carbon-Based Organisms

WASHINGTON—Expressing confidence that the nation would meet the ambitious benchmarks by the end of Donald Trump’s presidential term, Scott Pruitt, the president-elect’s nominee for chief of the Environmental Protection Agency, said Thursday he would seek a 30 percent cut in all carbon-based organisms upon assuming office.

Tips For Hotel Etiquette

Staying in a hotel can be a fun and luxurious experience, but it requires consideration of the guests around you. The Onion presents its guide to hotel etiquette:

Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.
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Lean In, Getty Images Alter Portrayal Of Women In Stock Photos

In order to promote positive and realistic images of women, Sheryl Sandberg announced that her nonprofit organization Lean In will team up with Getty Images to remove stock photos that perpetuate female stereotypes and replace them with photos of women as surgeons, soldiers, hunters, and other professions. What do you think?

  • “Finally, the internet will be clean of images that degrade women.”

    Mary Hadland Systems Analyst
  • “Yes, that seems like a nice, easy task that women can do.”

    Roman Edelman Valuation Advisory
  • “As long as the photos of women climbing the corporate ladder are shot from a low enough angle.”

    Nick Gold Piano Tuner

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