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Politics

Robert Mueller Driving SUV 100 MPH Down Runway As Air Force One Narrowly Lifts Off

PRINCE GEORGE’S COUNTY, MD—Sending a pair of guards scrambling for safety as he gunned his black SUV through a chain-link gate and onto the tarmac, Robert Mueller, the former FBI director who was recently tapped to lead the ongoing investigation into the Trump campaign’s ties to Russia, chased Air Force One down the runway at Joint Base Andrews moments before takeoff, sources reported Tuesday.
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Lieberman Defeated in Primary

Challenger Ned Lamont narrowly defeated conservative incumbent Joe Lieberman in the Connecticut Democratic primary. What do you think?
  • "I am happy to hear that Lieberman has decided to stay in the race as an independent. Sometimes voters are just being coy and don't really mean what they say."

    Alex Wilson Pension Planner
  • "Hooray! Ned Lamont won! My vote finally counted! Now, who is Ned Lamont?"

    Billy Vorlander Laser Printer Salesman
  • "Luckily, Lieberman can take comfort in the strong, able arms of George W. Bush. His gentle embrace will give solace, his warm lips succor. Lieberman will not suffer this grief alone."

    Leslie Waechter Purchasing Specialist

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