Lohan Sues E*Trade Over TV Ad

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Vol 46 Issue 10

Lazy Free Agent Wants To Try Out Over Phone

CHARLOTTE, NC—In an effort to avoid physical exertion, strenuous activity, and standing up, slothful free agent Hollis Thomas told several NFL general managers Friday that he would prefer to try out for their teams over the phone.
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Lohan Sues E*Trade Over TV Ad

Actress Lindsay Lohan filed a lawsuit against the Internet brokerage E*Trade over a commercial featuring a talking baby named Lindsay who suffers from "milkaholism." What do you think?
  • "That wasn't about Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay Lohan suffers from ALCO-holism."

    Scott Holfield
    Unemployed
  • "That's the baby who has the out-of-control pet beaver, right?"

    Chuck Anderson
    Store Manager
  • "Man, if she overreacts that badly, I definitely won't be releasing my commercial featuring an anorexic fame-hungry sometimes-lesbian who tries on clothes at Barneys."

    Elizabeth Coslaw
    Advertising Agent
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