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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Lugar Will Not Campaign For Republican Nominee

Sen. Dick Lugar (R-IN) announced he won’t campaign for Richard Mourdock, the Tea Party–backed candidate who defeated him in the primary. What do you think?

  • "What's he trying to prove? That Republicans can have dignity and character? Ship's sailed, buddy!"

    LeAnn Piper Home-Demonstration Agent
  • "Primaries really should have a clause that forces the loser to walk around in a sandwich board with the winner's face on it."

    Dennis Montone Systems Analyst
  • “He reminds me of the type of guy who after you steal his girlfriend won’t even tell you what she might like for her birthday.”

    Jack Marrow Lost-And-Found Clerk
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