adBlockCheck

Recent News

Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.

Departing Bo Obama Lands K Street Lobbyist Position

WASHINGTON—Touting his lengthy tenure in the White House and close personal relationships with the president of the United States and first lady, executives at Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck announced Monday that once the current administration steps down later this week, the departing Bo Obama will officially join their high-powered K Street lobbying firm.
End Of Section
  • More News

Man Uses Air Conditioner To Attack Michael Bay

A man reportedly attacked Michael Bay on the set of Transformers 4 in Hong Kong by swinging an air conditioning unit at Bay’s head, though the director was able to avoid serious injury by ducking and then wrestling the appliance away from his assailant. What do you think?

  • “This voodoo doll is more powerful than I ever could have imagined.”

    Wendy Rathaus Systems Analyst
  • “He does have one of those faces you just want to swing an air conditioner at.”

    Carlton Tracy Rehabilitation Therapist
  • “He didn’t deserve this. Maybe being struck with a lamp, but not this.”

    Bernie Cross Weaving Instructor

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close