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Mariah Carey Pregnant

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Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
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Mariah Carey Pregnant

Pop singer Mariah Carey announced that she and her husband Nick Cannon are expecting a baby next spring. What do you think?

  • "How inspirational. Now I'm going to go have a baby."

    Jackie Vandermark Unemployed
  • "She's a brave woman to defy the doctors who said she shouldn't have children because of the risk of permanent damage to her ass shapeliness."

    Oren Bishop Systems Analyst
  • "That's great news! I was just heading to my shift at the suicide hotline and was totally drawing a blank on a reason why people should live."

    Sean Posa Counselor

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