adBlockCheck

Recent News

A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

What You Need To Know About The Trump Administration’s Ties To Russia

New revelations from the U.S. intelligence community about potentially illegal communications between members of the Trump administration and Russian officials, which led to Michael Flynn resigning as national security advisor Monday, have increased calls for a wider investigation of Trump’s murky ties to Russia. Here’s what you need to know.
End Of Section
  • More News

Marijuana Vending Machine Unveiled In Colorado

A company called American Green has unveiled an automated, climate-controlled pot vending machine called the ZaZZZ, which dispenses medical marijuana only and uses ID fraud technology to verify users’ ages. What do you think?

  • “Nothing legitimizes medicine like selling it from a vending machine.”

    Joe Hayes 3D Animator
  • “This sounds like something a stoned person came up with and a sober friend implemented.”

    Adam Cantor Lens Mounter
  • “Can I still have an awkward conversation with the machine while I’m waiting for it to give me my drugs?”

    Kristen Cuddeback Daycare Assistant
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close