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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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Mattel Announces Barbie Movie

Toymaker Mattel announced that it has teamed up with Sony Studios to produce a live-action Barbie movie, a comedy that will reportedly follow the character as she takes on many of the dozens of roles the doll has adopted over the years. What do you think?

  • “Why would Hollywood be interested in a rail-thin blond they can easily manipulate?”

    Jean Swinson Accounts Manager
  • “They better not fuck up her backstory.”

    Marc Halpersin U-Haul Truck Driver
  • “I doubt the film will be able to capture the excitement and fun of putting clothes on dolls.”

    Steve Simms Unemployed
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