McDonald's Sales Down For First Time In 9 Years

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Vol 48 Issue 45

Anorexic Woman At Gym Looking Good

CHICAGO—Citing her shapeless physique, protruding skeleton, and jaundiced complexion, gym members exercising at a local Equinox Fitness Club on Friday confirmed that the anorexic woman working out on the first floor is looking good. “Oh, man, ...
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McDonald's Sales Down For First Time In 9 Years

McDonald’s worldwide sales fell 1.8 percent in October, marking the first drop in the fast food chain’s monthly sales figures since April 2003. What do you think?

  • “Yeah, I’ve been making my own Spicy Chicken McBites at home.”

    Rocco Bonifant
    Warehouse Guard
  • “Uh-oh. Did another restaurant learn how to make hamburgers?”

    Yvonne Weeks
    Hosiery Salesperson
  • “Maybe they should stop dragging their heels on that McRib shake, then.”

    Les Baxter
    Can Filler
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