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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Michelle Obama Presents Oscar To 'Argo'

First lady Michelle Obama announced the Oscars’ Best Picture winner via satellite last night, awarding the show’s top prize to the Ben Affleck–directed thriller Argo, which chronicles the rescue of six Americans during the Iranian hostage crisis. What do you think?

  • “As a conservative, that completely ruined the Hollywood I already hated.”

    Martin Ingersoll Seat Assembler
  • “But her husband didn’t even kill any bad guys in that one.”

    Gerald Wilmarth Puppeteer
  • “Oh, wow. Do you think the president was standing right there off-camera, or do you think he was in another room watching on TV?”

    Mary Tanaka Systems Analyst
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