Military Sex Scandals

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Military Sex Scandals

In the past year, several military officers have been involved in major sex scandals, ranging from adultery to sexual assault. What do you think about sex and the military?
  • "After a night of lovemaking with a female recruit, I honorably discharged my semen all over her tits."

    Randall Farber
    Private First Class
  • "What did these women think would happen, parading around in front of their commanding officers every day—right, left, right, left, right, left...?"

    Christine Forrester
    Math Teacher
  • "The real problem here is the uniform--It's like a chick magnet, man."

    Alvin Buchwald
    Midshipman
  • "I once had sex in the military, but my sergeant said it was okay, since I killed the gook bitch afterwards."

    Ed Delessandro
    Corporal
  • "You people don't understand! There was a war on! It was rape or be raped! You can't imagine the horror!"

    Leo Orff
    Lieutenant, USM (Ret.)
  • "This has been a problem ever since Bill Murray gave M.P. P.J. Soles the infamous 'Aunt Jemima Treatment.'"

    Janet Meyerson
    Systems Analyst