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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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Millionaire To Send Married Couple To Mars

American multimillionaire Dennis Tito, famous for being the first space tourist in 2001, announced plans to finance a 500-day mission that would send a spacecraft carrying a married civilian couple to fly by Mars and then return to Earth. What do you think?

  • “Absolutely nothing about this is a bad idea.”

    Bud Batha Sewage Plant Supervisor
  • “I hope there isn’t going to be one of those bullshit twists where the couple’s names turn out to be Adam and Eve.”

    Karen Humberger Helminthologist
  • “Sounds like a perfect trip, minus the wife part! Ha, I’m just kidding. I would love to experience something like that with Marie.”

    Douglas Alstadter Inseam Trimmer

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Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.

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