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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.
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Millionaire To Send Married Couple To Mars

American multimillionaire Dennis Tito, famous for being the first space tourist in 2001, announced plans to finance a 500-day mission that would send a spacecraft carrying a married civilian couple to fly by Mars and then return to Earth. What do you think?

  • “Absolutely nothing about this is a bad idea.”

    Bud Batha Sewage Plant Supervisor
  • “I hope there isn’t going to be one of those bullshit twists where the couple’s names turn out to be Adam and Eve.”

    Karen Humberger Helminthologist
  • “Sounds like a perfect trip, minus the wife part! Ha, I’m just kidding. I would love to experience something like that with Marie.”

    Douglas Alstadter Inseam Trimmer
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