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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.

Report: Grandpa Just Walks Like That Now

CULVER CITY, CA—According to family sources, the prominent limp displayed by local grandpa Marvin Adelstein on Tuesday is indicative of the fact that he just walks like that now.
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Multilingual Coca-Cola Ad Spurs Backlash

A 60-second advertisement for Coca-Cola that ran during the Super Bowl, which featured people singing the song “America the Beautiful” in multiple languages, has spurred backlash on Twitter from users who called the spot un-American for not being entirely in English. What do you you think?

  • “Yeah, that song sucks shit.”

    Steve Benson Prosthetic Dentist
  • “Football always sparks important national conversations.”

    Roy Flatman Mural Stenciler
  • “That’s what those other sounds were? Other languages?”

    Melanie Brown Kiln Unloader
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