NASCAR's New Electric Pace Car

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Vol 48 Issue 17

Pilots

ABC 8:00 p.m. EST/7:00 p.m. CST Two airline captains concoct new TV show ideas as they fly

Report: A-Rod Probably Thinking About Betting On Baseball

NEW YORK—After carefully analyzing the progression of contemptible things the Yankees third baseman has done in his career, a report released Friday by the University of Missouri's sports psychology department concluded Alex Rodriguez is most likely...

Cash Cab

Discovery 6:30 p.m. EST/5:30 p.m. CST People who can afford to take cabs get a once-in-a-lifetime shot at hundreds of dollars.
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TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Productivity

Scientists Posit Theoretical ‘Productive Weekend’

CAMBRIDGE, MA—Challenging long-accepted scientific convention, a group of leading MIT scientists published a report Thursday positing that, under certain rare and specific conditions, a so-called “productive weekend” is theoretically pos...

Technology

Technology Unfortunately Allows Distant Friends To Reconnect

WAYNE, PA—Providing them the tools necessary to bridge a gap that both individuals say they were more than willing to maintain indefinitely, sources confirmed Monday that the advent of modern technology has unfortunately allowed distant friends Mere...

NASCAR's New Electric Pace Car

  • "Thanks, NASCAR! The Talladega environment is saved forever!"


  • "As a NASCAR fan, I feel for all the pace car drivers who will have to be laid off because they aren't homosexual."


  • "Hey, anything we can do to anger the South is okay with me."


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