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Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

Voter Fraud: Myth Vs. Fact

Concerns over fraudulent voting have grown since the 2016 election, with President Trump himself claiming that millions of people voted illegally. The Onion debunks some common myths about voter fraud.
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Nation Celebrates Thanksgiving

All across the country, Americans are gathering with their loved ones to celebrate Thanksgiving. What are you thankful for this year?

  • “It’s almost Mannheim Steamroller time!”

    Marnie Panaretos Systems Analyst
  • “I’m still thankful the Lord gave us the strength to beat Rockaway during homecoming my junior year. Go Cougars!”

    Dan McQuary Livestock Salesman
  • “This sweater. My hands. Friends. Ambulance. Am I doing this right?”

    David Gillis Ski Lift Operator

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Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

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