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Neil Armstrong Dies

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Charles Koch Orders Sniper To Fire Warning Shot Next To Marco Rubio On Debate Stage

GREENVILLE, SC—In response to the presidential candidate’s unsatisfactory answer to a question about the economic effects of environmental regulations, Koch Industries CEO Charles Koch reportedly ordered a sniper positioned in the rafters of the Greenville Peace Center to fire a warning shot near Marco Rubio’s podium during Saturday’s Republican debate.
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Neil Armstrong Dies

Neil Armstrong, commander of the Apollo 11 mission and the first man to step foot on the moon, died Saturday following complications from heart surgery. He was 82. What do you think?

  • “At least by the time he passed he died knowing he had helped the moon become one of the most recognizable objects in the world.”

    Jessica Kosakura
    Gold Reclaimer
  • “So somebody’s knocking off men who’ve been on the moon. But why? Who benefits from it? Hmm.”

    Frank Krzanowski
    Systems Analyst
  • “It’s always sad when man dies. Sorry, I actually meant ‘a’ man.”

    Dennis Gawley
    Varnish Maker

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