adBlockCheck

Recent News

Tips For Back-To-School Shopping

As kids prepare to go back to school, parents are tasked with providing all the supplies and clothes they’ll need for the year. Here are The Onion’s tips for tackling back-to-school shopping.

Report: Sky Normal Today

WASHINGTON—Informing citizens there really wasn’t anything special going on up there, the nation’s scientists confirmed the sky is normal today.
End Of Section
  • More News

Netanyahu: Iran 6 Months From Bomb

On Meet the Press Sunday, Israeli prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu said Iran would have nuclear weapons capability in six to seven months and urged Americans to elect a president who would draw a “red line” against Iranian nuclear ambitions. What do you think?

  • “That’s terrifying! We need to give more money to Israel to make things better.”

    Dorian Halloran Plate Glass Glazier
  • “This sounds like a complicated problem that only a president with courage and no diplomatic skills at all could solve.”

    Jaquita Barnoya Securities Broker
  • “He’s only saying that because he doesn’t want to die in a nuclear explosion.”

    Zack Orlando Pollution Control Engineer

More from this section

Report: Sky Normal Today

WASHINGTON—Informing citizens there really wasn’t anything special going on up there, the nation’s scientists confirmed the sky is normal today.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close