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Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

After passing for eight touchdowns and rushing for another 10 in just the first three weeks of the season, Louisville Cardinals sophomore quarterback Lamar Jackson has quickly become the frontrunner to win the Heisman Trophy. Is he any good?

Obesity: Myth Vs. Fact

With as many as one in three people in the U.S. qualifying as obese, misconceptions are often formed about what it means to be significantly overweight. The Onion separates obesity myths from facts
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New DVR Can Skip Ads

A new DVR sold by the Dish Network comes with the capability to pass over ads and is sending shockwaves through the television industry. What do you think?

  • “Can it skip shows too? I’m a busy woman.”

    Malika Everhart Systems Analyst
  • "OK, but then what happens when you’re at a party and can’t participate in the conversation about Kraft’s new line of marinades?"

    Nels Carroll Die Tester
  • "Yeah, right. You spend decades bitching about advertising, then one night on YouTube you suddenly find yourself weeping uncontrollably over old Sears Diehard battery commercials from your childhood."

    Jordan Millkie Defect Repairer

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