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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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New Jersey To Use Military Vehicles As Polling Places

With the election four days away and much of New Jersey still reeling from Hurricane Sandy, state officials announced that military trucks would serve as polling locations in hard-hit areas. What do you think?

  • “I’d really like to vote in a monster truck if that’s in any way possible.”

    Diana Jervoise Systems Analyst
  • “My thoughts and prayers go out to the loved ones of the poor men and women deployed to that terrible, terrible place.”

    Lucas Heeks Inlayer
  • “Thank God this isn’t happening in a state that matters.”

    William Eastmond Lubrication Technician
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