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Report: Grandpa Just Walks Like That Now

CULVER CITY, CA—According to family sources, the prominent limp displayed by local grandpa Marvin Adelstein on Tuesday is indicative of the fact that he just walks like that now.

Family Moves Elderly Aunt Into Subconscious

RIO RANCHO, NM—After months spent deliberating the best option for their family, members of the Cooper household decided on Monday to move their elderly aunt Joyce Reynolds into their collective subconscious.

Wife Dropping Hints She Ready To Have Second Husband

LA JOLLA, CA—Noticing a sudden change in her demeanor and attentiveness when around young married men, sources confirmed Tuesday that area woman Michelle Roderick was beginning to drop hints that she wanted to try for a second husband.
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New Law Bans Cyclist Harassment

A law passed in Los Angeles makes it illegal for motorists to harass bicyclists verbally or physically. What do you think?

  • “I pretty much have my hands full harassing pedestrians and other motorists as it is.”

    Rich McNish Systems Analyst
  • "It was legal before? I've missed out on so much."

    Sunita Huckel Index Editor
  • "Illegal? I guess I'll just have to start bagging on illegal immigrants, then."

    Josh Steitzer Lead Handler
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