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New NPR Head Comes From 'Sesame Street'

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Director Has Clear Vision Of How Studio Will Destroy Movie

LOS ANGELES—Saying he can already picture exactly what the finished cut will look like on the big screen, Hollywood film director Paul Stanton told reporters Wednesday he has a clear vision of how studio executives will totally destroy his upcoming movie.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 14, 2016

ARIES: Once the laughter dies down, the party favors are put away, and the monkeys led back inside their cages, you’ll finally be given a chance to explain your side of the story.

Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.
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New NPR Head Comes From 'Sesame Street'

National Public Radio announced Sunday that its new CEO would be Gary Knell, CEO of the Sesame Workshop, home of Sesame Street. What do you think?

  • "Shoot. I was really hoping they would hire Catherine Sanchez, executive director of fundraising and donor relations at WQED Pittsburgh."

    Geoff Neeley Rack Loader
  • "As the type of person who ascribes sexual orientations to children's puppets, I'm sure this person is just another left-wing nut who will only further NPR's liberal agenda."

    Violet Anderson Weft Straightener
  • "Just to make sure, somebody's running Sesame Street now, right?"

    Andy Elliman Unemployed

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