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Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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New Orleans Survives Hurricane

Seven years to the day after Hurricane Katrina made landfall, New Orleans managed to survive a battering from Hurricane Isaac yesterday, with its reinforced system of levees keeping the city largely dry and safe amid the Category 1 storm. What do you think?

  • “It’s reassuring to know that New Orleans is now equipped to handle a hurricane much less powerful than Katrina.”

    Howard Garcia Jr. Unemployed
  • “I guess crippling poverty is going to have to do the work all by itself then.”

    Elsie Kanew Acid Filler
  • “Oh, yeah, well Sean Penn’s heading down there anyway.”

    Dick McQuarrie Endodontist

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