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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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New Plus-Size Clothing Store To Play Pre-Recorded Compliments In Fitting Rooms

According to the British website GetWestLondon, a new plus-size clothing store outside London plans to feature fitting rooms that play audio recordings of compliments while customers try on clothes. What do you think?

  • “That’s all right, I always bring some friends to give me insincere compliments whenever I go shopping.”

    Mary Clearwater Curriculum Designer
  • “It’s nice to know that in London, plus-size people are also considered idiots.”

    Matt Herndon Parking Ticket Issuer
  • “Sorry, but no machine can make the experience of trying on clothes as awkward and uncomfortable as a real-life salesperson.”

    Amelia Barston Visitor Center Representative
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