adBlockCheck

Recent News

Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.
End Of Section
  • More News

New Species Count: 8.7 Million

According to a recent statistical analysis of Earth’s biodiversity, there are currently 8.7 million different species on the planet. What do you think?

  • "So we can lose the polar bears and it's no big deal, right?"

    Adam Ward Systems Analyst
  • "I think that's a surprisingly even number for there not to be an intelligent designer behind it all."

    Laura Waterhouse Gastroenterologist
  • "It's great to finally have a fixed number. As an avid organism-watcher, I've already checked 383 species off my life list. And look, a dandelion—384! I'm getting closer."

    Jim Sutton Jug Builder

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close