New York Court: Lap Dances Not Tax-Exempt

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Vol 47 Issue 24

Dressing Up For Going Out

It's always hard to decide what to wear when you're going out for the evening. Here are some ways to look your best for a night on the town:  

Nation's Dads Treated To Mark Knopfler Meet-And-Greet

CHICAGO—In what many were calling "the best Father's Day present ever," the nation's dads were treated to a Mark Knopfler meet-and-greet Thursday, spending several minutes chatting and posing for photos with the former Dire Straits frontma...

Partygoer Gets Thoughtful

LAFAYETTE, LA—At approximately 11:20 P.M. Friday night, the festive attitude of local partygoer Nathan Daniels, 34, suddenly gave way to a more thoughtful and introspective mood, witnesses reported.

'America's Most Wanted' Canceled

After 23 years on the air, America's Most Wanted—the Fox show that dramatizes real crimes in order to assist in the capture of suspects—will no longer air as a weekly program.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Man Commits To New TV Show Just Hours After Getting Out Of 7-Season Series

UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.

New York Court: Lap Dances Not Tax-Exempt

Ruling that lap dances do not qualify for tax-exempt status as a "dramatic or musical art performance," a New York court has ordered a gentleman’s club to pay nearly $125,00 in back taxes. What do you think?

  • “Wait, so if it wasn’t just a performance, then that means…she was really into me after all! I knew it!”

    Mark Neeley
    Weigher and Mixer
  • "The club did it all wrong. First, it needed to get an MFA. Second, apply for and receive an NEA grant. Third, center its dramatic or musical art performance around a withering condemnation of the objectification of women through the ironic usage of the male gaze."

    Kirsten Anderson
    Stop Attacher
  • "What about if she pees on you? Doesn't that make things art these days?"

    Jonah Elliman
    Unemployed
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