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Mom In Nightgown Mode

APPLETON, WI—Noting that the changeover occurred “right on schedule” after she had finished the dishes and watched TV for an hour or two, family sources confirmed Monday night that local mom Linda Rampling had officially transitioned into nightgown mode.

Car Rolls Up To Stoplight Blasting Google Maps Directions

HOUSTON—Attracting the attention of adjacent motorists and nearby pedestrians who turned their heads to see where the booming noise was coming from, a 2006 Ford Focus is said to have rolled up to a local stoplight Friday blaring Google Maps directions.

34-Year-Old Asks For Big Piece

MADISON, WI—Directing the server to the large square in the corner, local 34-year-old Matthew Hinke asked for a big piece of cake during a workplace birthday party, sources confirmed Tuesday.
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New York Tour Bus Dangers

After two fatal tour bus accidents occurred in a single week, authorities in New York conducted random inspections in which 14 of 14 buses stopped were taken taken off the road for safety violations. What do you think?

  • "It's a good thing they found all 14 of the bad buses."

    Evan Blackwell Cap Maker
  • "You know, it’d be a lot more useful if the state would just release a list of commercial vehicles that unlicensed felons were allowed to operate."

    Patricia Lordan Turning Machine Operator
  • "Huh. 'Buses'? That word looks funny, right? I know I'm saying this out loud, but when it's transcribed it'll probably look all weird. Then again, doesn't 'busses' look even weirder? I bet it does."

    Thomas Marcellino Malt Roaster

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