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Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.

20 Years Of Harry Potter

J.K. Rowling published ‘Harry Potter And The Philosopher’s Stone’ on June 26th, 1997, and it instantly became a cultural touchstone. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the 20-year history of the Harry Potter franchise.

Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.
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Newt Won't Run

Stating that the current campaign finance laws preclude a "middle-class candidate" from running for president, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich announced that he would not run in 2008. What do you think?
  • "Did he already blow all his royalties from the contract with America?"

    Keith Solomon Farm Hand
  • "These campaign laws must change. They fail to provide political dinosaurs with believable excuses for dropping their candidacy."

    Amy Carr Music Librarian
  • "There goes Newt again! Looking out for the common man."

    Andrew Greer Personal Assistant

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