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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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No iPods To Kim Jong Il

The White House has imposed a ban on the sale of iPods to North Korea. What do you think?

  • "This won't do a damn thing. Everybody knows Zune is the preferred MP3 player of the Axis of Evil."

    Sean McGill Shoe Salesman
  • "Ouch! Right in the middle of the North Korean Christmas shopping season, too."

    Allara Jones Systems Analyst
  • "I don't know what good it will do to impose petty sanctions tailored specifically to annoy a crazy foreign leader with nuclear weapons, but what can it hurt?"

    Kai Thornton Large Truck Mechanic
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