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Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

New EPA Chief Proposes 30% Cut In All Carbon-Based Organisms

WASHINGTON—Expressing confidence that the nation would meet the ambitious benchmarks by the end of Donald Trump’s presidential term, Scott Pruitt, the president-elect’s nominee for chief of the Environmental Protection Agency, said Thursday he would seek a 30 percent cut in all carbon-based organisms upon assuming office.
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Northeast Sees Rise Of Mutant ‘Zombie’ Bees

Beekeepers in the Northeast have reported seeing an uptick in mutant “zombie” bees that behave erratically due to being attacked by small, parasitic flies that latch onto them and lay eggs in their bodies, which then hatch and cause the bees to become disoriented and eventually die. What do you think?

  • “Beekeepers can be such drama queens.”

    Rachelle O’Quinn Floor Plan Drafter
  • “Shhh—Did you hear that? Buzzing. I definitely heard buzzing. And where’s Debbie? I swear she was just here.”

    Chris Dotrice Aerial Acrobat
  • “I hope those beekeepers know you have to sting zombie bees in the head to fully kill them.”

    Moira Sweeney Systems Analyst

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