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NPR Fires Commentator For Comments On Fox

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Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Ugh, This A Place Where Bartenders Wear Bow Tie

PITTSBURGH—Saying they should have known from the moment they walked in the unmarked speakeasy entrance and spotted the extensive wood paneling, customers confirmed Friday that, ugh, this is one of those places where the bartenders all wear bow ties.

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NPR Fires Commentator For Comments On Fox

National Public Radio fired commentator Juan Williams on Wednesday following an appearance on the Fox News program The O'Reilly Factor in which he said that seeing people in Muslim garb on airplanes made him uncomfortable. What do you think?

  • "Who can blame him? They always take up all the flight attendants' time asking for halal meals."

    Jason Connor Systems Analyst
  • "Well, if Juan Williams said something offensive enough to get shit-canned from National Public Radio, it sounds like he aced the audition for The Juan Williams Hour on Fox News."

    Iris Cronin Obstetrician
  • "This is particularly egregious in light of how leniently they treated Carl Kasell after a live mic caught him calling Terry Gross a cunt."

    Philip Gibbon Driving Instructor

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