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Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

Voter Fraud: Myth Vs. Fact

Concerns over fraudulent voting have grown since the 2016 election, with President Trump himself claiming that millions of people voted illegally. The Onion debunks some common myths about voter fraud.
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Nuclear Plants Left Vulnerable

Federal regulators rejected nuclear policy group requests to increase security at California nuclear power plants, protecting them from aerial attack. What do you think?
  • "Good. All this country needs is more big government sticking its nose into the private business of nuclear power."

    Oren Musburger Stereo Salesman
  • "Quite a shrewd political move. With California and its 55 electoral votes wiped off the map, the Democrats don't stand a chance in '08."

    Sean Friel Paper Maker
  • "Why would the terrorists go through the trouble of an aerial attack when it's so easy to drive right up to the plant and attack from the ground?"

    Katie Pompillio Shoe Repairer

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