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The Life Of Diana, Princess Of Wales

Today marks 20 years since the funeral of Princess Diana, known to many as the “people’s princess.” The Onion looks back at the life of Princess Diana before it was cut tragically short.

Study: Other Countries Weird

BOSTON—Examining a wide variety of cross-cultural data, a Boston University study released Monday determined that other countries are weird.

Japanese Family Puts Aging Robot In Retirement Home

KYOTO, JAPAN—Saying the move to the assisted care facility was the right decision after so many years of operation, members of the Akiyama family finally put their aging robot in a retirement home, sources reported Friday.

North Korea Successfully Detonates Nuclear Scientist

PYONGYANG—Hailing it as a significant step forward for their ballistic weapons program just hours after suffering a failed missile launch, North Korean leaders announced Monday they had successfully detonated a nuclear scientist.
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Nuclear Subs Collide

Two nuclear submarines, one French and one British, collided in the Atlantic earlier this month, raising safety concerns. What do you think?
  • "Luckily, I heard the collision from a few feet away, which saved my nuclear sub from becoming part of a nasty pileup situation."

    Brody Nett Submarine Captain
  • "I can see how it happened. That space in the Atlantic between North and South America and Europe and Africa is so tight that underwater vessels can just barely squeak past each other."

    Lee Muller Systems Analyst
  • "I've said it before and I'll say it again: No one can top Russia when it comes to tragic submarine accidents."

    Stuckey Relyea Billing Coordinator

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