adBlockCheck

Recent News

Woman Conducting Ongoing Scientific Experiment On Own Skin

DULUTH, MN—Noting her methodic applications of various chemical agents in carefully controlled combinations, sources confirmed Wednesday that local woman Sara Holloway has been carrying out an open-ended scientific experiment on her own skin.
End Of Section
  • More News

Nuclear Waste Accumulating

Thousands of tons of spent nuclear fuel is building up at three power plants because the government¹s failure to open a promised storage facility in Nevada. What do you think?
  • "Surely there are faster, less costly ways to turn Nevada into a barren wasteland of radioactive decay."

    Yvonne Breen Building Contractor
  • "It's like my mom always said: 'A place for everything and everything in its place.' Of course, I never had more than one or two rods of nuclear waste lying around in my room."

    Peter Wexler Door-to-Door Salesman
  • "Whoever put Troma in charge of federal hazardous-waste management is an idiot."

    Ron Breslin Systems Analyst
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close