Obama Inaugurated

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DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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Obama Inaugurated

While Barack Obama officially took the presidential oath of office yesterday in a private ceremony, a public swearing in will occur on the Capitol steps today, followed by two inaugural balls and performances by the likes of Beyoncé and James Taylor. What do you think?

  • “It’s good they keep the real ceremony private. I don’t think the general public could handle seeing the president drinking all that blood from George Washington’s skull.”

    Ruth Hitchcock
    Acoustics Physicist
  • “It’s absolutely ridiculous that there’s even one inaugural ball given that the Benghazi matter is still very much under investigation."

    Leslie Ferrara
    Gusset Maker
  • “Nothing says presidential like some ‘Fire and Rain.’”

    Art Orloff