Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

Voter Fraud: Myth Vs. Fact

Concerns over fraudulent voting have grown since the 2016 election, with President Trump himself claiming that millions of people voted illegally. The Onion debunks some common myths about voter fraud.
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Obama: Wife Never Said 'Whitey'

Barack Obama responded to rumors of a video that purportedly featured his wife, Michelle, going on a racist tirade, by claiming she's never used the word "whitey." What do you think?
  • "What a vile way to exploit the national trauma associated with the w-word."

    Coco Kimball Systems Analyst
  • "John McCain had better hope the Democrats don't dig into his past for racial epithets."

    Albert Munro Butcher
  • "Ha-ha! Now he said it!"

    Geoff Goldsmith Screen Printer

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