Obama Will Not Preempt Football

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Grin Slowly Spreads Across Mom’s Face As Meal Revealed To Contain Healthy Ingredients

‘The Mashed Potatoes Are Actually Made With Cauliflower,’ She Announces

VERONA, WI—Having waited until everyone at the table had finished their dinner Monday, a knowing grin reportedly spread across local mother Angela Hopkins’ face as she announced to her family that the mashed potatoes had in fact been made using cauliflower as a healthier alternative.
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Obama Will Not Preempt Football

President Obama promised that Thursday's jobs address to Congress would not conflict with the NFL season opener between Green Bay and New Orleans. What do you think?

  • “So, in terms of the most powerful branches of government, it now goes legislative, sporting, judicial, and executive?”

    Keith Harkness
    Log Scaler
  • "Think of all the jobs he’s sustaining in the beer-drinking, snack-eating, and obscenity-hurling sectors!"

    Sarah Peth
    Weight Analyst
  • "This seems sort of pointless. Doesn't everyone in Congress have a job?"

    Marty Lake
    Mold Filler