Obama's Twitter Account Hacked

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Vol 46 Issue 13

NBA To Start Charging Teams For Free Throws

NEW YORK—In an effort to increase the league's revenue and offset the expensive cost of foul shots, commissioner David Stern announced Monday that the NBA would begin charging teams a $50 fee per free throw attempt.

Chimp In Cocaine Study Starts Lying To Friends

ATLANTA—Early in the study, Bobo's elevated mood and excessive chattering made him quite popular among the other chimpanzees. But researchers claimed that his increased irritability, short temper, and absenteeism at the jungle gym did not go unnoticed.
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Obama's Twitter Account Hacked

An unemployed young Frenchman is being accused of hacking into the Twitter accounts of President Barack Obama and Britney Spears by correctly answering their security questions and then resetting their passwords. What do you think?

  • "So this guy was pretending to be the guy who usually pretends to be the president? Scary."

    Jon Armstrong
    Systems Analyst
  • "I don’t even want to imagine the kind of 140-character discord some prankster terrorist could have wreaked with that information."

    Jessica Frederiksen
    Justowriter Operator
  • "He tipped his hand when he tweeted ‘Pass ce projet de loi de santé goddamn donc je ne ressemble pas à un jackoff’ from Obama's account."

    Neil Steineckert
    Oil Pipe Inspector
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